Fragile Egos and Neurotic Students

Okay, today it is "venting" time. Three new art students have started taking lessons this week and one art student went "mental" on me. It turned into an extremely difficult and painful event that ended up in termination of lessons. After one of my new students had their first lesson, I got an email a week later. This email was full of wildly exageratted accusations, verbally attacking me in a way that was very, very hurtful to me. Quite frankly this person came off sounding like some sort of mental case in need of psycho-therapy. I think this person needs a padded cell more than they need art lessons. At first I thought it was just a personality conflict, but now I think there is something more going on here than that. In my five years of teaching art students in my home, I have never had anything like this happen before. Most of the reason for this student's reaction is because I was familiar with some of their artwork and I actually had the nerve to suggest where this person might be able to improve their work. Well, the thing that makes no sense to me at all is this person came to me last year asking if they could take lessons and learn how to do animals like I did because they weren't really satisfied with how their animal art looked. This person did not seem to have much confidence in their art, so I figured they had a realistic idea of where they were at as an artist and was willing to take constructive critiques. But then when lessons start and I actually go and make suggestions of how this person can improve their work, they go ballistic on me. I actually complimented this student on one of the pieces they entered into the juried show because I liked the composition. I just didn't like the technique and the lack of color. I tried very hard to be tactful and I never actually said, "I don't like your art" even though I really didn't like it that much.

Okay, here comes the venting. I am TIRED of dealing with artists and their overly fragile egos. If you don't come to my lessons to improve your artwork and you aren't willing to check your ego at the door, then you can just go home! I am sick and tired of dealing with this issue and I am running out of patience! I will never tell a person I hate their artwork, but if I don't love it, I am not going to tell them that either. A student needs to be able to take honest constructive critiques without letting their ego get in the way. If you can't do that, then you are wasting my time and yours.

Maybe I am odd or something, but I actually like to seek out other artists, whose work I respect and love, to critique my work. I say, "bring on the criticism" because I will learn and grow as an artist. Last year I went to a well known Boise art gallery to see if I could get the owner to show my work. Well, the owner thought my landscapes were too much like other landscapes he had seen before. Like a snapshot of a famous landmark that he had seen a hundred times before. Although this was a blow to me, I actually found it very helpful. I look at my landscapes with a different perspective now and it has helped me grow. I think I am a better artist because of this advise. I am not insecure in my art. I am secure enough in my artwork to enter dozens of art contests, not win an award or get rejected and still believe I am an excellent artist and still continue to enter contests. I am not afraid of rejection or criticism. I believe in my work and I know it is good and I don't need an art contest juror or a gallery owner to validate that. If that makes me conceited and proud then that's tough. I don't care!

Anyway, I have come to a conclusion. Unless it is someone I already know, I am not going to teach one-on-one private adult art classes anymore. I will only do groups of two or more. There is safety in numbers! And until I at least get to know the student a little better, I will keep the topic of my conversation focused only on art instruction. What have I learned from this painful event? I have learned it is not always good to treat everyone like they are your close friend. Not everyone can take openness and honesty. You have to edit what you say. Not everyone has a sense of humor and unfortunately, some people just can't be trusted and you have to set boundaries. I have also learned that some people are so insecure about themselves and their art that they are unteachable. I have bigger fish to fry than to walk on eggshells because I fear I will "offend" someone by making a suggestion, however tactful it may be.

Okay, venting is done and you can breath a sigh of relief! The next blog will probably be more "normal."